


A fire running through my veins, love.

by pseudofoucault333



Series: Fei writes for Tumblr [11]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: 1940s, Bucky Barnes Returns, Characters Watching Star Wars, Coming Out, Denial of Feelings, First Kiss, M/M, Minor Clint Barton/Natasha Romanov, Minor Jane Foster/Thor, Minor Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Minor Riley/Sam Wilson, Mutual Pining, Oblivious Bucky Barnes, Valentine's Day, steve has feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-15
Updated: 2016-02-15
Packaged: 2018-05-20 16:02:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6015574
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pseudofoucault333/pseuds/pseudofoucault333
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve had never had a proper Valentine's day compared to all the others and had long since accepted it. But now that he had Bucky back in his life, that he wants to share the day with, it was only a matter of time before the truth came to light.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A fire running through my veins, love.

**Title:** A fire running through my veins, love.  
**Author:** pseudofoucault333 // Redtintedhale  
**Rating:** M  
**Pairing:** Steve/Bucky, Tony/Pepper, Clint/Natasha, Thor/Jane, Riley/Sam  
**POV:** 3rd  
**Summary:** Steve had never had a proper Valentine's day compared to all the others and had long since accepted it. But now that he had Bucky back in his life, that he wants to share the day with, it was only a matter of time before the truth came to light.  
**Disclaimer:** The whole concept of Captain America etc © Marvel , don’t sue because the contents of my bank account is only worth next to nothing in US$. Also and I can't stress this enough I don't give permission for this or any other of my stuff to be reposted on Goodreads or anywhere else. If I find out it is I'll be pissed. Plot mostly based on fiction…i.e not real….but a girl can wish <3 title © Florrie.  
**Author Notes:** unbeta'd Written for the amazing [Viktoria](http://rogers-x-barnes.tumblr.com/) for Valentine's day <3 Comments and Kudos = pwp and cookies :D

Back in the 1940’s Valentine’s Day was a whole different ball game. It hadn’t ever been as big of a deal as it was destined to become, not as commercialised and fixated on dedicated to showing the person in your life that they were loved. Although that was mostly due to the lack of disposable income to spend on frivolous things like flowers not to mention roses or chocolate. The nearest you got was making a card out of a sheet of paper folded in half with their name scribbled on the outside and inside some poem or greeting. 

It had been just like every other day, with only a few if any couples being able to afford it, of having enough cash to go out dancing or to bars to drink themselves into oblivion. Where they’d then leave to wrestle between the sheets as though that in itself was enough to prove how in love they were. Usually Bucky would get roped into going out with some girl or another despite every bit of their income being called for groceries or rent but Steve would never call him out on it, knowing that after all the work he did and time he spent taking care of him he deserved the time to have fun. 

If he did wish it was with him was neither here nor there.

The only time Bucky would refuse to go was if Steve was sick unless Steve guilted him into it for a couple of hours at least. But the sound of the guy he wanted stumbling through the door with a girl wittering away and the smell of cheap whiskey and her perfume permeating through the entire apartment did have Steve wondering why he was such a good friend. 

But back then Platonic valentines hadn’t been a thing, though if it had been Steve was sure he would have got more than his fair share of them. But as it was Steve was just left to mourn the fact that he’d never the kind of guy that anyone let alone Bucky would ever want. Those times he’d lay in bed wheezing as he sketched Bucky from memory and try not to depress himself even more. The last thing he needed was Bucky coming home and asking what was wrong.

In that way the 40’s had been so much easier that when he was alone Steve couldn’t help but wonder where those tradtions had gone and who in their right mind had decided to it make such a ridiculously big deal.

By comparison Valentine’s Day at the Tower was a big thing. Not exactly busy as many of the team would jet off somewhere or another, and it was one of the only days that they put on the calendar as a day off right up there was New Years, Thanksgiving and Christmas. Thankfully Shield respected that and would cover for them with other teams, only calling them in if it was absolutely unavoidable because no-one wanted to hear Tony rambling a mile a minute about being cockblocked or have the Hulk smashing people into walls.

But every year was the same; Tony would take Pepper to Paris for the long weekend on their private jet. No matter what she was doing whether it was press conference or a project in his name he’d still book it and she never objected since they spent so little time together between their workaholic life styles. She’d kiss his cheek when he presented her with the tickets and a packed bag, leaving her to grab her passport and call in her cover. 

Clint and Natasha, if they weren’t on Assignment whether Shield Related, freelance or Avenger Related, would start the morning with Clint burning the waffles he’d attempt to make for their breakfast in bed. It had long since become established that he was the worst chef in the tower but that was the only day Natasha would tolerate it instead of curse him for making a mess. They’d end up at some diner a couple of blocks away before going to their floor in the tower and essentially cutting themselves off from everything but the other since they rarely got to spend time alone together. It often had Steve wondering how their relationship survived but he wasn’t suicidal enough to ask.

Thor would take Jane to Asgard to spent time with his family and the woman he rarely got to see due to her work and her being moved around in Shield Custody for protection. It was a rare thing to see the smile that crossed the God’s face at the sight of the brunette Astrophysicist and how he treated her like she was some precious statue. Though that year there was murmurings amongst the team that he was planning to propose and needed to speak to his mother about a family heirloom that he wanted to give Jane. There was nothing to say he would actually do it while they were in his home world but knowing Thor, Steve wouldn’t be surprised if he came back a happily engaged man.

Bruce was always the more morbid member of the team when it came to Valentine’s Day. He spent the morning thinking about Betty and the life he could have had if he hadn’t pushed her away or been damned by that accident. Steve would watch him carefully often giving him his space in case he wanted to talk about it or not but once his coffee was downed Bruce spent his time in the lab working tirelessly on some project or another. It was a vain attempt to try and get his mind of his self implicated singledom everyone knew but no-one else knew how to attempt to try and sooth him without the Big Guy showing up.

Then there was Steve. Back when he’d first woke up he’d made sure to go and see Peggy every year, bring her some flowers and they’d chat about everything he’d missed out on during her lucid days. On her more confused days he’d just read poems aloud to her, mostly Wordsworth and Coleridge, until she fell asleep. He’d then grab a take out on the way back to the tower and huddle away on his floor, revelling in the silence as he sketched Bucky’s face from memory over and over. Trying to persuade himself that he wasn’t grieving for a love he’d never really had.

All that had changed when he realised that Bucky was alive, controlled by Hydra and under lock and key but alive. After the Triskelion Incident he’d spent months when between missions looking for his old best friend with Nat or Sam; His heart breaking every time a trail ran cold and left him back at square one. It really did seem like if Bucky didn’t want to be found he wouldn’t be found. But he persevered, spending a few Valentines Days alone in other countries tracking Bucky down leaving Nat with Clint and Sam with Riley. Then he seemed to give up, and reluctantly go on the blind dates set up for him with which ever agent or unsuspecting friend of a friend via a colleagues or friends or on the worst occasion a Grindr Profile that Steve was still trying to get Tony to shut down. But that was when Bucky finally came out of hiding and turned himself in.

It had been a couple of years since then, with Steve’s feelings for his best friend poking and prodding him constantly in the chest when he looked at him. Getting even worse when he persuaded Bucky to stay with him after he was released from the Shield Detainment centre after his treatment was done. But this year he couldn’t find it in himself to accept the blind date offer from Sam when the person wouldn’t be another Bucky and that was all he wanted. It also seemed like Bucky was against Valentines Day from the get go, a change from how he’d used to look forward the day.

So while the Tower was quiet Steve had done his training early, eaten his breakfast and decided to spend the rest of the day settling in with popcorn and a collection of movies on the big screen in the common room. There was a gradually growing list of movies that he was being told to see but with missions and everything else he’d just let it get longer and longer so this seemed as good a time as any. 

The movie was loading on Netflix when he heard the doors to the life open revealing the sight of Bucky stretching his arms, both metal and flesh, over his head. His hair was up in a ponytail as he refused to have his hair cut at the moment, dressed in his work out gear of a baggy Henley and sweats. What skin Steve could see was glistening with sweat from his time in the gym and the blond couldn’t seem to pull his gaze from his friend as he wiped his forehead with the towel wrapped around his neck and walked to the fridge for a bottle of water.

Steve’s mouth went dry as he watched Bucky bare his neck as he glugged the water down before resting the bottle against the side of his neck in a vain attempt to cool himself as he sat down beside Steve seemingly oblivious.

“Watcha watchin’ Stevie?” Bucky asked hoarsely, snagging the bowl of popcorn from Steven’s lap with his free hand and putting it in his own.

“Star Wars, Clint’s been trying to get me watch the whole series for a while.” Steve shrugged, clearing his throat as he turned his gaze back to the TV and pressed play. 

Bucky Hmmed as he downed another mouthful of water and brushed the condensation off the bottle across his forehead before putting the bottle on the floor at his feet. There was silence between them as the opening credits started though Steve’s attention kept moving to Bucky which if Bucky noticed he didn’t comment on.

“I’m surprised you aren’t on another one of those blind dates. I’m sure Nat mentioned someone from the Legal department at Shield was interested in trying to get into your pants.” Bucky murmured through a handful of popcorn.

“I’m on the verge of giving up period because that’s all they want! But none of them will never be who I really want to be with so it’s a waste really.” Steve shrugged, grabbing handful of popcorn from the bowl though freezing at the feel of hand around his wrist.

“And who is it you really want Stevie? I mean if they don’t want you then they obviously don’t know what they’re missing out on. They aren’t worth your time and its better you forget them.” Bucky said, his gaze meeting Steve’s whose gaze skimmed Bucky’s lips.

“I didn’t spend months trudging through Europe or years trying to find him for him to not be worth my time. Besides there’s no likelihood he’d want me anyway.” Steve sighed, tugging his wrist out his friend’s grip and hoping he was cryptic enough that Bucky wouldn’t read between the lines.

“Say that again? Because unless I’m remembering wrong you didn’t swing for the same team…did you Stevie?” Bucky asked causing Steve to groan and the sound of the movie being paused causing him to reluctantly look back at Bucky.

“Look I wasn’t gonna say anything because things were different back then. But times have changed, and it’s not seen as wrong…” Steve started, though knew he couldn’t continue. Admitting he was gay was one thing, admitting it was Bucky he had loved since way back when was something completely different.

“So why didn’t you tell me? You know I wouldn’t have judged you…I just want you to be happy.” Bucky said softly, watching uncertainly as Steve got to his feet, the urge to watch the movies gone.

“And I will, when I realise I can’t have you.” Steve murmured as he grabbed the popcorn and headed for the lift.

“Steve wait!” 

Steve leaned against the back of the lift as the doors closed and he heard Bucky’s fists rattling them to get him to stop. But this wasn’t a conversation he needed to have now, he’d already said more than enough.

He made it to his floor and barricaded himself in his own room, knowing it was only a matter of time before Bucky would come up to try and get him to talk. He didn’t need that rejection, which was something he really couldn’t bear thinking about, he just needed to pretend he hadn’t opened his big mouth. He ended up huddled on his bed with the popcorn beside him, watching Star Wars on a Stark Tablet, not the quality compared to the big screen but it was better than having Bucky asking him question. Yet as the opening credits were finishing he heard the bang at his door and the sound of Jarvis telling him it was Bucky. He wanted to deny Bucky access but knew it was easier to just get it over with. 

“Let him in Jarvis…” He sighed, pressing pause on the tablet and watching the doors open.

The towel was gone from Bucky’s neck and there was frantic look on his face that had Steve’s gaze moving to his feet under the duvet. He heard Bucky entering and the feel of him sitting beside him on the bed, his fingers lacing between Steve’s causing the blond to swallow as he made himself look up.

“Stevie, you have me.” 

Steve frowned as his gaze rested on their interlaced hands.

“I don’t think you fully realise what I said Bucky.”

“No, let me finish. From the moment I saw you getting beat to a pulp by that guy I knew I couldn’t walk away and leave you there. That I would spend every fibre of my being making sure you were happy, that you knew someone loved you. I’ll admit I didn’t show it as good as I should have but I didn’t know if you were into guys or girls, you were pretty hard to read in that department.” Bucky said softly, brushing his metal thumb over Steve’s chin.

“Because it was just you. That’s all I wanted then and all I want right now; none of that has changed. I just didn’t know how to say it without you beating me to a pulp.” Steve said watching the smile brush over Bucky’s face.

“That won’t happen. I’ve been waiting decades for this.” Bucky murmured, resting his forehead against Steve’s before pressing a soft kiss to his lips that had Steve leaning into it eagerly.

“I feel like I’ve been waiting longer.” Steve groaned against his lips as he entangled his arms around Bucky’s neck and pulled him closer for a deeper kiss.

Needless to say, watching Star wars and making out quickly became Steve and Bucky’s Valentine’s Day routine and neither of them would have had it any other way.

Fin.


End file.
